Sponsoring joy

It is amazing, the joy I feel from very simple things. May it not leave for what few minutes I have left in this body, whether such be but seconds or decades! Today I acquired a small, folding step stool to help me climb into the camper. I am overjoyed at the ease with which I'm now able to heave my injured bulk into bed. It is as awesome as the camper itself. And to think that I, dancer with never-failing legs, find myself needing such help...For truth, everything changes.

It seems that my body doesn't really know what to think these days. Pain in lots of odd places, blood pressure of 168/98, lots of discomfort in my chest when I move quickly or get my heart rate up. But I still have full use of my facilities, am still filled with joy and peace, and most wonderfully, have several times this week reached my daily goal of getting 5 people to spontaneously say, "You've made my day!" It is this, combined with the multitude of smiles in my wake, that gives me confidence that I am leading a wondrously beautiful life, regardless whether those who do not see the good that I do, believe me worthy of respect or support.

My most joyful entertainment tool is a simple, $.75 squeaker found in many dog toys. With one of these I can confound, confuse and entertain a large group of both adults and children. Today, 4 of the 6 people who told me that I made their day, did so because of the entertainment created by one of these little plastic toys in the hands of a skilled children's entertainer. I hope to get few examples on video and on the Web soon. I can imagine such a video going viral.

Soon,  I will be posting a gofundme.com appeal for crowd-sourcing sponsors of my little life endeavor to spread joy everywhere I can. I truly enjoy what I do,  but sometimes living so close to the edge is difficult.  For instance, coming up with the money to buy more balloons when I run out; it is a great expense to me,  yet I know that many people spend such money as though it is pocket change. One day's worth of middle  class-style shopping can provide balloons (latex smiles) for literally hundreds or even thousands of strangers, the majority of which are children.

I understand why such sponsors don't just offer themselves without prompting. We are, are we not, in the land of, "If you don't make your own money, you are worthless?" Or so or consumer-driven society would have us believe. So, on the basis of that Foundation, of what value am I? At the same time, I have a great many people each day thank me for living as I do and doing what I do. So even if I were deluding myself as to my value upon the earth, meager though it is, still I have all these strangers and new friends blessing me with their gratitude. I am SO blessed!

In any case,  please consider becoming a sponsor. Presently, I spend about half of my income buying balloons. Those of you who know me personally know that I don't drink, smoke, or waste money on drugs. I would love to get my own smile fixed soon as it is beginning to cause pain, but will buy more balloons before going to a dentist. So, if you have few dollars and would like to gift others (friends you may never know) with moments that, through my efforts, help make their lives more joyful and less stressful,  please consider using PayPal to donate whatever you feel would bless you to give. You can be assured I'll get it if you send it to my email,  twistofair(at)yahoo.com.

Regardless of any donation or gift,  I wish you the greatest joy, deepest peace, and all the love you can imagine for your entire life.

Time to roll again?

Soon, it will be time to get on the road again. It is much harder this year. The pin and stiffness from the accident makes doing a lot of the things I usually do more difficult. I still wear my helmet most of the time, even though it hurts because I would rather live. After the save of the seatbelt, I've developed a greater respect for safety equiptment. If my daughter hadn't decided to move to Vegas and asked me to put the bike in the U-Haul, I would still be in Bellingham, being treated by the chiropractor and massage therapist every other day. I think I need it, but it is much harder to get that level of care while on the road. I thought I had to come down here because I kept running out of money. Usually, it is easy to make money while in the road, but I didn't consider just how much my health impacted my ability to perform.

I was able to work a flea market yesterday and made a little money, (Thank you, Universe) but not like I was able to last year. It's okay, I am close friends with Change, and the Unniverse always supplies. Occasionally, I forget that for a few minutes, but my memory returns in just a few.

I love my life. I reaally do. Even though money has been tight frequently throughout most of my life thus far, I feel very wealthy. We all have life eevents that we consider to be problems and lack of funding seems to be one of mine. However, I have a number of friends who also have money problems...because they have too much stuff and are having to work all the time to support their stuff. I've found that, even when I had a lot of comfortable things, I wasn't all the comfortablee because I had to bow to the obligation of working harder and longer than I wanted to because having a bunch of stuff means I have to pay out a lot of money to support it all.

Years ago, I was studied to become a Realtor in San Francisco. I saw many multimillion dollar homes, many that cost more than a million a year just in upkeep. I like having quality things, it's enjoyable, but the tradeoff of not having those things is that I don't have to worry about supporting them, and  I don't need to worry about losing them. This extra time allows me to play with the kids. What joy!  It also gives me time to meditate and release many of the issues of the heart/mind that would rob me of peace.

Okay, that's enough for now. I'm typing on my tablet and that doesn't lend itself to long posts.
Om Shanti

Twisting and lessons.

The balloons are flying over Lake Havasu City. They didn't let me on the lot because they were afraid I would twist their balloons into poodles. I kept telling them that I could only twist balloons that I could get my hands around. Instead, I went to the loccal flea market. They let me in free, but then realized that they had "made a mistake" and though I didn't have to pay today, I would have to rent a booth space to work it in the future. No wonder there aren't very many kids there...there's nothing there for them. I'm happy I was there for them today.

It's getting close to time to hit the road again. I'm going to head down to Yuma next, stay there until February 2nd. Then I'll head up to Vegas and twist a couple days before my young friend gets to town.

I'm sitting in a Burger Kind watching this young family. It is very interesting to hear how the parents are programming their children's emotions. The kids are 3, 5, and 6. The 5 yearols is a boy. The dad is about 27, the mom is no older than 25. The son dropped his hamburger and the mom got mad at him. The dad also showed his displeasure, though he let the mom handle the situation. She asked him why he did it and he said  he didn't know. She cut him off and said hee did know and because he lied, he can go without a hamburger. Then she went back to eating as did the rest of the family, except the boy; he laid his head on his arms and sat very still, obviously very unhappy.

Mom likely had no idea that she just tought the boy that getting mad when he doesn't get what he wants is correct behavior for everyone except on his parents. The two likely learned the same lesson. For half an hour,  that little boy sat there almost unmoving. Pretty amazing self control mfor a 5 year old boy.

Sponsoring balloons

Well, sometimes giving my balloons away doesn't seem to work well, for me at least. I am overjoyed that I have the skills to make people's day, as I'm often told, but I would love to find a sponsor for the cost of the balloons. I live so close to the edge that when it comes time to buy more balloons, I will often find myself doing without some important things I need. Balloons come first, then stuff like phone bills and gas for the bike. I'm blessed that the Universe loves to feed me so I don't have to concern myself with food. I think I may make a video asking for sponsors on gofundme.com.

Empowerment

It's interesting to me to watch my daughter grow older. I've seen my nieces get up, but I wasn't often in touch with them. My daughter, on the other hand, I have been in touch with since she was 13. She is now 27. I see her doing many things that I remember she adamantly swearing that she would never do, like smoking amd drinking. I remember her somewhat looking down on my son (whom I've rarely had any comtact with --his choice) for some of the stuff he publicly professes to enjoy, only to find her doing the same things. No judgment here, she is her own being making her own choices, it is just fascinating to watch the process.

The other night, I stopped in a restaurant and sat at the counter.  I made a balloon for the server that had a litle teaching written on it. I write, "Cho o se a happy day." The highlighted O in "Choose" I write with a different color. The lesson is that the "o" stands out when one is looking for it in the same way the joy stamds out in each moment if one is looking for it.

Well, a man came in with his family amd sat down. After some time, he came up to the register and told so,eone there that he had been waiting a long time and hadn't seen a server yet. My server said in a loud stage whisper that, yes, he had seen a server since he had drinks. He replied that the hostess gave the drinks to his family and that was the last time.  Well, it turned out that this family was in my server's section. Shentook their order and while she was punching in their order, said loudly enough that lots of folks heard, "f~~~g a~~ hole". Soon after, she was fired.

Odd things happen around me and she would up crying on my shoulder,  complaining that, "That man cost me my job." Unfortunately, it didn't come out, but it was obvious to me that she cost herself the job by her lack of self control. She chose to play the victim without looking at her role. Had she taken responsibility for her role, she would have been empowered to offer other options than firing and may have saved her job. I write all this here because it is a good lesson for us all.

If something negative happens in our lives and we take responsibility for the whole of it, then that taking of responsibility empowers us to find creative solutions. If we take the victim route, then we have to take whatever comes our way.

I watched a lovely movie last night with a v err y surprising ending that speaks to just this lesson,  called 'About Time.' Rated PG, I think, for sexual references and perhaps a few cuss words. Overall, a decent enough movie for teens and adults...I recommend it.

Lake Havasu City, AZ

I arrived in town two nights ago. I had the idea of surprising a friend of mine (who I used to dance with a lot) by showing up at the Elks Lodge. This idea was helped along by a mutual friend. Well, it was a surprise alright...seems that since the last time I saw her and this time, she has gotten into a relationship. I got the distinct impression that, as far as her new male friend was concerned at least, my presence was not welcomed. She and I had a couple dances and then I left. While I was in the parking lot, getting ready to go find a place to pop the camper, one of the Lodge's bigwigs stopped and talked with me about my "rig"...the bike/trailer combination. He wound up giving me permission to stay on the Elks property for the night.

Backing up a little in the story, when we hooked my trailer up to my daughter's car to haul it down here to the Southwest, I had to change the wiring harness to get the trailer to work with her car. After getting it to Vegas, I had to reinstall the old harness, but was unable to get the tail lights to work on the trailer. I got all the other lights to work, just not the tail lights. Back to the Elks: our mutual friend referred to above (Tony) volunteered to fix the tail lights. That was the reason I was given permission to use the private Elks RV lot. Tony did wind up fixing my tail lights; turned out to be a pretty time consuming job. I doubt I would've figured out the problem by myself.

Well, I've wondered about town for a couple days now. I have learned that the towns that I feel "welcomed" in are towns that my presence does some manner of good for someone. Havasu, this year, doesn't feel welcoming. Just as an example, I went to Wal-Mart's to pop the camper last night. After getting it all set up and being warmly ensconced in my sleeping bag, a security guard came by to tell me that I would not be allowed to camp in the parking lot and would have to move. Now, it is well known that if you are traveling in a camper, you can pull into any Wal-Mart and sleep for the night. This Wal-Mart didn't even have signs prohibiting camping. Well, it turns out that there is no public camping allowed in Havasu anywhere. One has to drive out of town into the Open Range to find free camping.

I drove out to the open range and found a spot to camp. As I was preparing the camper for the night--with a flashlight in my mouth--a cop pulled to a stop up on the road and shut off his lights. Sitting there, lights off, it seemed after my recent expulsion, that he was waiting to get backup to come talk to me. Well, after a few minutes I decided to just pack up and leave the area. As I drove in front of him (a sheriff) I got off the bike and approached him with my hands carefully away from my sides, and asked what was up. He said he was watching traffic and that it was fine for me to camp there.

Thus far, I've made $1 since I've been in town. I've spent pretty much everything I had...which wasn't much. I have had the opportunity to plant a few mind-seeds into a few young people. I love doing that, it makes me feel that my choice to live this way is valid. Yes, I have a few issues, usually centered around funds, but then, doesn't almost everyone? I've just traded my big issues for smaller ones.

I've noticed that though I often complain of not having a few dollars, other friends of mine are complaining about not having the thousands they need to pay their monthly bills. To someone who can't swim, water an inch above their nose presents a tremendous challenge. To someone who can swim, staying afloat in water above their heads sometimes becomes a life-threatening challenge. There is a street festival in town tomorrow. Last year I was paid $100 to come twist. I also was allowed to accept tips for my balloons. This year, I was given permission to busk, but no extra pay. I was told that it was a fundraiser and that is why I needed to volunteer my time and balloons...the people who are the recipients of the funds that are raised are often in a better position financially than I am. That isn't a complaint, but rather I find it to be an amusing little fact.

Okay, it's getting dark and I am exhausted. I have chiropractic and massage treatments scheduled for tomorrow so I guess it is time to go collect the camper and head out into the desert.

Christmas update

I'm now in Las Vegas. It was a tough drive down because of the injuries from the accident, but we made it. I put my bike in the back of my daughter's U-Haul while she pulled my trailer with her car. We got a later than desired start due to a blanket of snow. I didn't want Cly to drive on snow hauling  a trailer when she had never pulled a trailer before. Then it turned out that we had trouble getting the lights to the trailer to work with her car. Well, we finally got everything ready to go and hit the road.

I've got to say, there was a big comedy of errors getting everything ready! However, most parts aren't needed for the story to work. The biggest event of them all, though, happened just south of Seattle. I was following Cly at 60 MPH in busy traffic when suddenly sparks began to fly and the trailer started wobbling all over the place. Cly pulled to the emergency lane with me right behind her. We found that the ball had broken or unscrewed. In any case, it wasn't there. (I sure hope no one was hurt by the metal pieces!!!) The trailer was attached to her car only by the emergency chains. Luckily, I was able to take the ball from my motorcycle off and put it on her car. We had no more trouble with the trailer the rest of the way.

It felt odd, getting back on the road in this way. In fact, I find that I must trust the Universe even more than usual because I am not able to work much at all. Usually, I can trust that I can ride to where I need to to make a living and have the agility to do so once I get there. Right now, I don't have the agility and can barely ride.

So, I'll ask this, if you would like to help me make it through this time of healing in the form of financial Dana, it will reach me if you PayPal it to my email, twistofair (at) yahoo.com. Any help will be greatly appreciated and well used.

I am presently camping on my daughter's futon in Vegas. I don't gamble so being a block off the strip is interesting. I've walked through the Circus Circus casino looking for cheap food...seems they don't do that anymore. It used to be that the casino's would offer very cheap food, knowing that if people came into the casino, then it is likely that they would play. Seems that the big casinos don't need to offer such things anymore. All the food was at rich tourist prices.

My arms have been hurting a lot for the past few weeks and so twisting balloons (or even ripping toilet paper off the roll) is almost too much to do. Seeing all these tourists walking around while I need money and have a few balloons, yet not being able to twist is really challenging. Sigh...the Universe is giving me a present...I wonder what it might be.

Christmas came and went without much notice in my life this year. Well, I knew that it was Christmas, but there was hardly any sign that Christmas had happened. My friend, Francine, cooked a lovely dinner for me, Cly and Alexaray about a week ago; an early Christmas. I exchanged a couple Christmas wishes with a few folks and that was about it. I had an Ethiopian meal at one restaurant and desert at another and that was it. Cly and Serryn went to his family's celebrations and I just hung out. This was the most low-key Christmas holiday I've had yet in this lifetime. Not sure how I feel about that. :-/

All in all, even though I am having difficulties, I still feel very blessed and content. It is joyful to once again be talking with people about how awesome they are. It really is an amazing feeling to tell a stranger how wonderful they are and to see them tear up. Or when I ask a deep question and see that this was the first time they had ever thought about what might be deeper than who they were going to marry and what kind of job they might want to have. I am truly a blessed man!

May all beings feel as blessed as I do. Om Shanti and Happy Holidays.